It happens and I have to own it. Typically, I’m a glass-half full person, able to let many things roll off my back. Until I can’t. Then I get cranky. By the way, being cranky isn’t a bad thing, we all have those moments (or days). But my attitude affects mom’s attitude, and it can turn into a downward spiral quickly if we’re not careful. I’ve given a lot of thought to … [Read more...]
When Talking to Aging Parents – Choose Your Words Carefully
"Mom, don't you remember?" I have years of conditioning to my mother’s communication style. Mom thinks about things deeply, questions everything, and like all of us, makes assumptions. Her thought process often ends up with her having a fight with you in her head. Suddenly she is mad, and you have no idea why. Or she is thinking about something and will ask you a question … [Read more...]
Your Seniors Legacy in a Family History
“And now it’s done.” When my mom’s father was in his mid-80’s I sat him down with his brother and sisters, fed them lunch and got them to talk about their lives. It was fun learning about their childhood, adulthood, and relatives long gone. And it was an incredible history lesson. Everyone had vivid memories of WWII, the Great Depression and where they were when they heard … [Read more...]
How Caregivers Can Cope with Their Feelings as Parents Age
What feelings to expect at the first signs your elderly parents need help. Changes in your aging loved ones can be subtle at first. They start to forget appointments or names. They repeat the same story to you over and over again. You notice they are less organized, the house is messy, and their appearance maybe not be as put together. The realization sets in: “My aging … [Read more...]
Caregiver Burnout and Feelings of Anger
Feeling angry is normal and it’s OK. Some days I am so angry with my father - angry and resentful that he died and left me responsible for my mother. (Jump to Lessons Learned) If you are a caregiver, you understand. If you are not there yet, don’t be surprised by these feelings. They are normal and recognizing them is another step in your grieving and for me, part of the … [Read more...]